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Why some Black women only date White Men

Posted by James, 17 Jan

We always talk about Black women and how they can’t date White men. Well, there are those black women that only date White men. I remember a pal of mine telling me once that she will never get married to Black man. And even as kids, when playing make believe, she was always married to a White guy.

The reason for women like her who only date white men may be very similar to the reasons why most Black women only date Black men … attraction. Some also feel that Black men treat them better than any other man ever could, and they feel that they'd rather have what they know instead of experimenting with what they don’t know.

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Some Black women are just not physically attracted to Black men. And as much as parents usually like hooking us up with people of our own race, well it reaches a time when you have to be honest with yourself. Imagine my pal for example: As a child, her first crush was Adam Sandler, then as she got older, she fell in love with Mel Gibson. This doesn’t mean that Black men aren’t handsome – they are just not her type.

Some also feel that White men (not ALL but many) find black women to be remarkable in every sense of the word; hence Black women tend to gravitate towards those affections. Much as her husband treats her better than any man ever had, one lady admits that she has been with some White men that disgusted her with their behaviors. But she says that generally, older White men and very mature on a broader level than with Black men on many levels.

Some are just wildly turned on by the differences … skin color, hair, being raised in different cultures, music, foods … the list is endless. Its all about the desire for the mysterious and unknown. And for some, its just pure love because there are those that forget that we are ‘black’ and ‘white’ and just coincidentally happened to fall in love with a White guys.

One thing we all have to remember is that not every White man is a Black woman’s dream. It all depends on the individual … good and bad comes in all colors.

With that said, the generic phrase - ‘It should be about love and not color’ – is cute. But in this case, not entirely truthful. Its not only about love. Much as love gets cultivated eventually, there is physical attraction and a declaration to date only one race. Racist or preference?

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1842 responses to "Why some Black women only date White Men"

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  1.   Kirurgen says:
    Posted: 12 Oct 10

    .Some white men - like me - adore the virtues and values that black women have. Compared to white women. Educated black men often are considerate too, but others take a black woman for granted. And request obedience. I love what these black women in here say. !. because they are considerate, and has a warm heart. Others don´t.. It all comes down to the person. I am so glad that more and more black women educate themselves, So that they get a proper appreciation of who they are. Gender roles are also so much more easy with a black woman. Which makes it a bliss to be with a black woman. Black women wants to be proud of their man. Which is natures meaning. We should respect and love each other for who we are. I love the Obama family for their devotion to each other. I have met so many black women who was molested by black family members or black men, that they would never consider a black man as a possible spouse. Love doesn´t have to do with color but respect, love and appreciation Some black women will abuse your kindness, but that is - to me- a matter of lack of self esteem. My white family are racists, but I have NEVER met that among black parents. My black women’s parents have respected me for who I am, and their father have been like brothers to me. . I try my best to be loving and caring, and don´t expect to understand all the choices and desires that my black woman have . But at the end of the day I know that she want us to be happy together. Black women can be tough on each other. But not on me. I´m a medical scientist, and neither a white or black women understand what I do. But a black woman appreciate that I do my best to make a difference, and my hard work. Praise be on the nature of black women. We laugh, have fun, and are still are able to be real. It is - to me- a bliss that a black woman hold on to her basic values. Yes black women can be stubborn if they have big responsibilities. ( I have a boy of seven with the former Chief of Finance in H-P. And she put her job before building a family and brought our son into foster care for 6 years.. That is just not acceptable to me. But a lot black women want to do their best. Also at their job. That was to much for me, since I loved her to death. ) I once landed a senior job for an African woman in an international company. She was greeted by the CEO himself, and presented as their new collegue, But she was too scared take a simple test, and was insecure about her own abilities. So I praise that a lot of black women get a descent comprehension of their own virtues, and educate themselves. BTW. Where has all the Goddess´s gone. ??. A black woman is often like a goddess to me, though I treat her as my beloved. Praise also to the initiatives to educate black women, especially in Africa. Since an educated woman will do her best to secure good health and prosperity to her children.

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  2.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 11 Oct 10

    Keep posting Anthony. I agree with you and I am a white guy. I my views are unpopular but I am with you all the way.:-)

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  3.   kissime says:
    Posted: 09 Oct 10

    @ SoDamnSweet I add: HALLELUJAH!!! Amen!!!

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    • nicknack83 says:
      Posted: 11 Oct 10

      LOL...If he hates the fact that Black women like white men, he should just go to black planet and look for love there....simple!

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      • Anthony2012 says:
        Posted: 17 Oct 10

        I love the fact that black women date white men,,because it seperates the phonys from the fakes , .....muwahhh !

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        • chocolate09 says:
          Posted: 18 Oct 10

          LOL...I think he is just mad because he can't get the attention he wants from women. That is why he comes here and harasses them. It's pathetic if you ask me.

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        • chocolate09 says:
          Posted: 18 Oct 10

          Phonys from the fakes, LOL....they are the same thing. He is so angry with the fact that some black women like white men that he can get his word and thoughts straight. This is just hilarious.

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          • Anthony2012, says:
            Posted: 20 Oct 10

            Funny how you talk and cant even afford to become a real member and post a picture up !........... lol...

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          • dricks says:
            Posted: 23 Oct 10

            Anthony2012 you prove your ignorance...you also prove the reason why so many black women are considering dating outside of their race.....the foolishness and childness you exhibit unfortunately is very common and might I add is also very typical in many confused brothers. If you don't like black women dating men of other races...maybe you should act like a gentleman instead of a childish teen and break the stereotype.

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  4.   shaggy138 says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 10

    So true SoDamnSweet, I've personally lived that story about the catcalls many times. I even had coworkers confront her and say stuff in front of me, since we both worked together for a time, hence how I met her. From white friends it was all the ignorant questions about what is sex like and s*** like that, but most of the black friends seemed to take issue with it. I just assumed it was the south side of Chicago that's like that, since nobody else seemed to have that kind of a problem. God knows there is ignorance in abundance in all races there.

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    • Anthony2012 says:
      Posted: 05 Oct 10

      No black people aint racist Im around black panthers everyday , but not a member we just would possibly have atleast one thing to ourselves without, other races getting the grand share n profit, beneifits of it .....put simply...by all means date all the black gurlz you want please , because the beyoncess , keisha coles and debbie allens dont want white men,, just the ones who tend to get rejected by there own race, grew up in predominately white schools, And the caucasoid influence runs powerfully influential in there lives, I have never seen a hot" blk woman with a white guy..real sisters want soul..deep deep soul others just want to try something different , and partake in the white mans european nature to conqour and invade,,, most black people arent too educated on who they are so they will try to stretch n survive , Eat from the tree of life by all means nessacary so much that it shows, clearly in the fact of not helping and lifting each other up when needed, communitys forums etc.. Hey I love all people because Jesus teaches me too, but at the same time ,Im not stupid either...most interracial relationships dont last that long because people are always in it because of Life still imitates art...And the last couple of years television is showing you slowly and slowly its ok to be seen with a blk woman now if ur white in more movies and television shows and it helps white guys and black girls who always wanted to that its ok now and tv encourages it,, because most people are followers ..very few are leaders and no one wants to feel embarrased or stared down in public so TV definately helps iron that out for them...Alot white men always liked a black woman , they were just intimidated by superior white society to openly, and publicly admit it......now you can hate on me if you want........because the world hates the truth !!.. now go run and tell that !!

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      • SoDamnSweet says:
        Posted: 05 Oct 10

        Not now, nor ever have I been rejected by my own race. “we just would possibly have atleast one thing to ourselves without, other races getting the grand share n profit, beneifits of it …..put simply…by all means date all the black gurlz you want please” And that is what exactly? A better question… how do you go from this: “Black women and white men , I think there perfect for each other !… Know that there together Maybe just maybe they can leave the rest of us who date outside our race alone becausr instead of eye balling , makin noises , laughing , and raising eyebrows they can join in to there real wants and needs disguised by envy and hate” to the post above? You said “most black people arent too educated on who they are” but do YOU know who you are? You flop back and forth between disliking black women to “wanting one thing” to yourself “without other races getting the grand share n profit”. It’s clear you have an issue with black women through your rants, raves, and contradictory statements. So why do you even care what we do? If we choose to date white men then that’s what we choose to do! You said yourself you date outside your races so what’s the problem? It’s ok for black men to date outside their race but not women? Typical. If you don’t like black women or the way black people operate then don’t associate yourself with them! It’s as simple as that. Please take your own advice… “leave the rest of us who date outside our race alone” and go do you! “The rest of us who date outside our race” catch enough backlash and don’t need it from a bitter person who doesn’t practice what they preach.

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      • Gee00 says:
        Posted: 26 Nov 10

        Anthony2012, I'm not sure if you really feel the redoric that you are spewing, or if your just saying it in order to spark debate. One thing I can say is that it is sad. You made reference to GOD in one of your post, but you spew so much hatred with your words. When GOD created man, he did not say that it would be inproper or a sin to date someone that didn't look exactly like you. As for black woman not knowing who they really are, I think you are again in error. I think most black women have overcome so many odds that they know exactly who they are and where they've come from. Knowing this makes us that much stronger and confident in ourselves and the choices that we make. Because we know who we are, we are ok dating outside of the box that society has put every race in, in order to prolong racism and hatred. I refuse to be put into a box, or to ever make excuses for what I choose to do with my life. My last boyfriend was Asian. The Asian community was not thrilled about me dating him, nor was the black community. I did not hate them for their thoughts though, I PITYED THEM FOR THEIR CLOSEDMINDEDNESS, WITH A SMILE. Be Blessed

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  5.   SoDamnSweet says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 10

    Is it fair to say the same thing about Black men? That they are jealous of the white man’s high ranking in the world and the many “opportunities” they are presented with over black men? “its funny cause they be quick to be ignorant wen a blk guy is with a white girl ..lol.. they the biggest hypocrites around” The same goes for black men! I was out with my girls one night when a couple, a black woman and white man, walked by holding hands. A group of black guys walking behind them made it their business to make a comment about them, loud enough for everyone around to hear it, “There is nothing worse than seeing a bad black woman with a white man!” I personally have never understood why SOME black women have an issue with black men being with white women. You fall for whoever you connect with! “white men are just living out there fantasy and blk women want a piece of what white women been gettin all along…” And the same can’t be said about black men with white women? Wanting to be catered to? Treated like a king as I often hear “black women don’t do for their men”? Your statement goes both ways and can be said from both ends.

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  6.   Anthony2012 says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 10

    majority of black women are the biggest hipocrites on the planet, as well as jealous of white women for their high t regard in society.to go n prove that the capitist white society has the prominent influence in america..white men are just living out there fantasy and blk women want a piece of what white women been gettin all along and thats global accepptance ..lol..its funny cause they be quick to be ignorant wen a blk guy is with a white girl ..lol.. they the biggest hypocrites around

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  7.   brownclown says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 10

    I just think we have to be careful not to generalize too much by saying things like, white men treat you well and black men don't. It can't be that uniform but rather varies from individual to individual. I've been treated very well as well as very poorly by both black and white men.

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  8.   Scoff/Sarah says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 10

    Having raised two daughters, we had this discussion come up several times through the years. Being in a military enviroment, there exposure to many cultures, more so when we were stationed in Europe limited there dating choices as often they had dates with white boys. Still in all when it came to marriage they both married black men. Now was this a concous choice I have not idea, one of those husbands turned out to be a big bust. The other one is a hard working honest man, that any woman would want to be with. So who knows, from my expierence, it's the character not the color. Of course I can say this all now, regressing to the mid 1960's when Scoff and I were invovled, we both would of been run out of the county, if not physically harmed. I do truly believe that our families would of disowned us, like I said changing times, not changing hearts or mind set. Just adding my thoughts, like many we all have our opinions. Love and God Bless Sarah

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  9.   shaggy138 says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 10

    I find that last comment very interesting, considering the hatred I got from my ex's family. They could not stand the fact that she was dating a white guy, even though I treated her and her son great, was loving and nurturing, was finishing my masters and had a great job, and she was happy. The pressure from her twin sister and father got to her after 3 years of dating and 2 years engaged, and she broke it off and cut me out of her and her son's life completely. I was personally shocked, as I thought it would be my family that would have the issue with it. Surprisingly all my parents said was "Are you happy? Is she a good person and a good mother? That's all we care about" This after having heard plenty of use of the n-word and racist jokes my whole life, was quite a surprise. Is it common for black families to not want their daughters dating outside of their race?

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    • Gee00 says:
      Posted: 26 Nov 10

      Hey Shaffy138. I can't speak for all African-American families, but for mine; In the past, when it was not common or popular to date outside of your race, I was doing it. My family never verbally expressed thier disappointment, but I could tell by comments they said about others that they did not agree with it. Later it was explained to me that my family knew that I would be successful some day and felt that I should keep my talents within my race to further my race. I always found this ironic because I am African-American and Native American and have cousins of every hue. Today, they have grown and just want what is best for me, whatever that might be.

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  10.   Scoff/Sarah says:
    Posted: 24 Sep 10

    Changing times: Recently I had lunch with one my cousins, noticing she was rather distraught, I questioned her if some thing was amiss. After some subtle prodding she finally divulged that her youngest daughter who is in her last year of college was involved with a white man. Being like the ol'woman I am, I just had to ask some questions, as to the character, where did they meet, what does the future have in store, oh y'all know the regular drill. Almost in tears she started filling in the blanks he was in graduate school getting his master's in some sort of high powered science type field, (hmmm I thought okay this means probably a good income), they have been in a steady relationship for over 6 months. Fumbling in her purse she pulls out a photograph and hands it to me. Examining the photograph I noticed it's a group of what appears to be ordinary college students, few black and few white, I did note my cousin's daughter on the front row. I then asked is the boy in this group, she nodded yes, as she reached over and pointed him out. I commented wow is is very handsome, tall well built blond hair. Holding back her tears she replied her father and I have tried so hard to instill in her not to bring no white boy home when she was growing up, and now look at her she actually flaunts it right in front of us as well as the rest of the family and friends. Setting back I again asked some blunt questions, does he treat her well, is this a serious relationship, adding as an after thought does she appear to be happy and comfortable with the relationship. Sipping my coffee I kinda let these questions or comments sink in. Breaking the silence, she mumbled yes she does, and the young man is a very hard worker and already has a very good paying job in a lab somewhere. (again I'm thinking things could be a hell of a lot worst besides him being white) I couldn't stand it anymore I had to offer my advice just support her and let things work out God has a plan trust him. Driving home I thought back to some of my white friends through the years and the dilemma they had with Don't bring no black boy home. Thought I would just share this, kinda of interesting. Love and God Bless Sarah

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    • Genuine3150 says:
      Posted: 01 Oct 10

      No Shaggy138...Is not common in black families to not want thier daughter to date outside their race...My family do nt have a problem with me dating a white a guy, not at all and I love white man because they are loving, caring, romantic,easy to be with etc...I have some friends dating white guy and they are happy to be together as well as their family are happy for them...There are some black family having a problem with their daughter/son dating white people, just like there are some white family having a problem with their daughter/son dating outside their race, but there are some white/black family who dont have a problem with their relatives dating outside their race, so it just depend...Good luck on finding your right black woman again... Ester

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      • Anthony2012 says:
        Posted: 05 Oct 10

        hey shaggy I wasnt surprised that you grew up in the house hearing the N-word alot and racist jokes so in turn why be surprised when the girl cut ur engagement off...you carry the blood of in home racists and in the end maybe it was suppose to go that way hey ,, maybe it was ur lost and her gain?...atleast you still have ur bachelors degree!..

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  11.   NYlawyermom says:
    Posted: 18 Sep 10

    Black Women in the US have finally wisenned up & are exercising their options to date/marry outside their race rather than carrying the burden of keeping the Black race together by holding out for the ideal Black man! I say "finally" because having grown up in Europe, where Interracial marriages between Black Women & White men or other races has been the norm for decades, it has only been in the last 20 or so years that the number of Black Women/White Men marriages have on the upswing. Better late than never. Black Women graduate from colleges & grad school at higher percentages than Black Males. Black Males that are highly educated tend to date outside their race White/Spanish/Asian women, at greater percentages than Black Women. ie. Black date outside their race at a greater percentage than Black Women! According to 2010 polls, Asian Women/White Men are the greatest percentage of interracial marriages, followed by Black Men/White Women! As an Ivy League educated Black female who is a lawyer, married to a White man who is an Investment Banker, I can tell you that I was simpley found all the qualities in my hubby that I wanted, regardless of race. I will also tell you that more White men asked me out than Black men, so the odds were stacked! In the 10 years of dating in my 20s before getting married, I would say about 20 White guys asked me out, compared to 2 Black guys! True love is color blind. Also race does not dictate similarity! The notion that one will have more in common with someone of the same race is flawed, since no race is a monolithic group. All Black people do not share the same culture simply because of their skin color. All Black people do not share the same ideologies or views on life. Both my hubby & I grew up in upper middle class households, valued education, shared the same religious & political views. The only difference is that I am Black (mini version of Naomi Campbell) and he is White (looks like Tom Brady)

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  12.   ChocolatLadi says:
    Posted: 13 Sep 10

    That was nice Sarah:) You are lucky to have him around to spoil and to take care of you. If something happens to my father and my mother was to remarry it would be prob. be a WM. 'Cause she is just that type of girl....

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  13.   Scoff/Sarah says:
    Posted: 12 Sep 10

    Ms. Chocolatladi One of them the oldest, is pretty much okay with me seeing a white man as she is fully aware of our past history, as long as I'm happy. She has met Scoff twice even surprised me with the comment Moma your very lucky to have a true gentleman in your life, he treats you like a Queen. The younger one is very reserved, I can tell she is not comfortable with a white man so to speak in the family, the three encounters that Scoff has been around I noticed she made no attempt to engage him in any conversation. Scoff and I have made them fully aware of our fiances, we are not wealthy yet we have substanial holdings, to ease any unspoken concerns I gave each of them a copy of my will each will get 50% of my assets. Will we ever marry, maybe right now we both are content with our current status, at times I may spend several days at Scoff's then my place for a week or so with Scoff visiting a few days just what ever works for us. My one sister Ann visits us often, her favorite joke is Love Sarah

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  14.   ChocolatLadi says:
    Posted: 12 Sep 10

    Sarah I'm glad you and Scoff still had that spark after 30+ plus years, so what did your daughters say when you told them that you had a boyfriend and that he was a wm??? We know what you grand-daughter had said, that he made you happy and that you laugh.

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  15.   ChocolatLadi says:
    Posted: 12 Sep 10

    Sarah I glad you and Scoff still had that spark after 30+ plus years, so what did your daughters say when you told them that you had a boyfriend and that he was a wm??? We know what you grand-daughter had said, that he made you happy and that you laugh.

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  16.   Scoff/Sarah says:
    Posted: 10 Sep 10

    I just dropped my this blog, I normally post on another blog, however I just wanted to add, a nickels worth. After Scoff and I got togeather way or should I say way-way back in our younger day, I thought about dating just white men. Again being at an all black college, (Florida A&M1966-1970) that was not really an option, Thank God I didn't, as I must say dating black men is not different than dating white men, some you so to speak click with some you just don't. After my first husband passed away, I dated several black men some were very nice, but even at my age there was just no spark, I was looking for something at times I really couldn't explain it just that era where you know that it's right. I will regress to something my late father passed on kind of an anlogy, if a pair of shoes don't feel right when you first put them on, what makes you think that they will fit in 6 months. When I first ran into Scoff after 30 plus years, we talked on the telephone for God only knows how many hours. Then we and say we because both of us wanted to be sure, decided to meet for coffee at a Denny's little did we know after two hours of talking that we would be invovled to the depth we are. I knew that after date if you can call it that, the SPARK was there, I had to fight with myself, to keep from just saying Scoff your place or mine, lolol. We laugh about that now, then he reminds me of our first kiss, and what I said oh my God I kissed a white boy what will people think. Just passing on a little wisdom, not much but a little, lolo Love and God Bless Sarah

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  17.   Cynamyn82 says:
    Posted: 09 Sep 10

    White men have been my interest since grade 3. I grew up in a predominantly white environment and went to predominantly white schools until my last two years of undergrad. I have not hatred in my heart towards black men, but I am more attracted to men outside of my race...physically and romantically. With the type of personality I have, I have found myself to me VERY compatible to white men.

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    • bizzyb2008 says:
      Posted: 12 Sep 10

      I can totally relate with this comment. When I was 5 I had my 1st kiss from a white guy, I grew up in a predominantly white area and when I was around black people, they didn't accept me because I didn't speak ebonics or live in the projects. Other cultures (mainly white) accepted me for me. As far as dating, I've found that most white men are more caring and lovable than black men. Where I live there is a huge shortage of educated, ambitious black men. Not to mention men who are ready to settle down. I love the way white guys look, to me they are soooooo sexy. I love their voice (it seems to sound more young) I love everything about them. My boyfriend is in the navy and he looks beautiful in uniform lol Best thing is, we are compatible. He grew up around black people, I grew up around white, so no need to explain myself or him explain himself. We like things that constantly change and want a family soon. Can't beat that. It's what your heart desires.

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      • Cynamyn82 says:
        Posted: 12 Sep 10

        Amen to that!! No wonder you can relate :) I wish you and you guy in the best. White men do look great in uniform ;)

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      • Anthony2012 says:
        Posted: 10 Oct 10

        most white people dislike there own skin color so They have told me thats why the like the opposite of what they are.........

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        • SashaKim007 says:
          Posted: 19 Nov 10

          Just another bitter black man that handle the fact we don't want your trifling asses anymore....

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          • TheGlassRose says:
            Posted: 28 Nov 10

            Cracking up like no tomorrow! Now you know you are so wrong for that - NOT! You are so right for telling the TRUTH.

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    • Kyna1 says:
      Posted: 09 Oct 10

      I must agree with you Cynamyn. I, too, was raised in a predominately white neighborhood and have ALWAYS been attracted to white men (even thought there was a gorgeous Japanese gymnast in collage who was quite handsome and sweet). I have only dated white men my entire life and still continue to enjoy the company of white men. I, too, have found myself quite compatible to white men, hence my joining this website!

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      • Anthony2012 says:
        Posted: 10 Oct 10

        Men are here to conqour ,,, and most people are tired of the same thing,,, If interracial relationships were so acceppted like you women portray it to be...there would be no need for this particular disscussion..Black women been at the bottom of the totem pole and now white men everywhere want there fetish and fantasies and curiousoties answered in this milleniem ......tommirrow if they choose arabic women then that would be the new fad out....its just a phaze , barbie in beverly hills aint even trippin cause she always gon be number #1 in a capitalist country regardless of education and carreer ...the capitalist swing controls and monitors everything And this is just the way there scoop has recently swung up in around......You can tell black women getting happy for nothin.....

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        • EDDYREADY/BIGTEN says:
          Posted: 30 Oct 10

          ANTHONY2012,IF YOU FEEL BLACK WOMEN ARE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE TOTEM POLE,WHO PUT THEM THERE? THE BLACK MAN HAD THEM FRIST.IF THE WHITE MAN WANTS TO BRING THEM TO THE TOP,MORE POWER TO THEM ! ANTHONY,I THINK YOU NEED TO FIND A GOOD WHITE WOMAN TO BRING YOU TO THE TOP OF YOUR SO CALLED TOTEM POLE! EDDYREADY

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          • TheGlassRose says:
            Posted: 29 Nov 10

            Awwwwwwwwwwww right now (laughing hysterically)! Absolutely love that comment =)

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      • Cynamyn82 says:
        Posted: 10 Oct 10

        Hi Kyna, I'm glad you found happiness in the men you chose. Also, its nice to see people going after what they really want instead of keeping their feelings suppressed due to what this racist society may think of them.

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        • EDDYREADY/BIGTEN says:
          Posted: 30 Oct 10

          HEY:,CYNAMYN82,I LIKED WHAT YOU SAID.WE MAY LIVE IN A RACIST SOCIETY BUT GOOD PEOPLE LIKE US DO NOT HAVE TO ABIDE BY IT ! EDDYREADY/BIGTEN CARES!

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  18.   Lacrymosa777 says:
    Posted: 08 Sep 10

    I like dating white men because there is something erotic about it. I cannot explain it and I am not saying it does not exist with the same races, I am just giving you my experience. :)

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    • EDDYREADY/BIGTEN says:
      Posted: 30 Oct 10

      ALSO WELL SAID LACRYMOSA777! LIKE CHLOE89 SAID. MIND-HEART=EROTIC. YES,THEY CAN GO GOOD TOGETHER! EDDYREADY/BIGTEN

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  19.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 06 Sep 10

    Well cloe89, I hope you have positive experiences dating white men but I hope you have positive experiences dating men in general. May all your dates be positive and growing experiences for you.

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  20.   sweetrose407 says:
    Posted: 06 Sep 10

    I personally prefer white, men, but i dont exclude myself from other races though. It is never an issue of money, because most of the time i make more money than my significant other.

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  21.   chloe89 says:
    Posted: 03 Sep 10

    I believe some the of the reasons as to why black women date white men only is because maybe their pass relationship they might of have.Or it could be what we always say it is, their preference. It could be the type of vibe they get when they see or are around a white man. Or it can be from what they read in these many articles, that white men are more caring, considerate and loving- Maybe they base their love life on that. Some black women may not want the ideal relationship for a black female. We might want to come out of the box, our comfort zone, and try and want something different. I'm just going on with what i think. This is why we all have a preference. Now I have never dated outside my race before and would like to have that experience and see where it may go. I agree with paramore that its not about the money etc. I also think its what your mind and your heart tells you.

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    • EDDYREADY/BIGTEN says:
      Posted: 30 Oct 10

      WELL SAID,CHLOE89. YOU SOUND LIKE A VERY TOGETHER YOUNG LADY .YOU LAST SENTENCE SAYS IT ALL. MIND AND HEART,WHEN THEY BOTH WORK TOGETHER,WOW! EDDYREADY/BIGTEN CARES!

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  22.   paramore says:
    Posted: 31 Aug 10

    Personally i prefer white men, and it not the money, I just get this tingle when i see a cute one. ^ _^

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  23.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 30 Aug 10

    Share them preferably if you are an African American woman as you would know best, please. And please break it down further than preference and choice. What influences your preference and choice beside looks or money or status in society?

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    • 00seven says:
      Posted: 04 Oct 10

      I’m here to officially, set the record straight. The reason the white men are attracted to the dark part of the chicken, is because they originate from us. White men will always and forever be attracted to us, the African American true blooded black women. Allow me to get a little deeper with our history. No, we are not conservative nor are we promiscuous, we just know innately how to love PROPERLY. No one on the face of this earth can EVER compare to the black woman. Did you know that our origins are of GREATNESS? Why wouldn’t you be attracted to that. I know I would. White men are attracted to us in the most elusive way. We are the Mother of all civilization, therefore cementing our birth to what you mere mortals call LIFE.

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      • serenity33 says:
        Posted: 04 Oct 10

        Actually I was asking why some Black women only date white men, not the other way around.;-) Your post would be better placed on why the white men go for black women.:-)

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        • Anthony2012 says:
          Posted: 07 Oct 10

          YOU SEE BLACK WOMEN ARE ALWAYS TRYING TO PROVE A POINT ABOUT SOMETHING THAT DOESNT EVEN HAVE TO DO WITH THE CORRECT SUBJECT MATTER..LOL..THEY GET INTO THERE THING LIKE THERE TELLING YOU SOMETHING OR "GIVING IT TO YOU STRAIGHT "...OR LETTIN YOU HAVE IT MODE....LOL...I always listen first , But I have noticed that they cant debate efficiently ...:)..

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  24.   Newawlunzguy says:
    Posted: 30 Aug 10

    Yes please. Share your thoughts.

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  25.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 30 Aug 10

    Well obviously it is about preference and choice. I would like to hear from people who fit the topic why they have this preference and make this choice? Anyone with experience in this area to answer the question? I would really like to hear from them.

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  26.   Newawlunzguy says:
    Posted: 29 Aug 10

    It's about preference and choice - something that those might not understand.

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  27.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 29 Aug 10

    I have heard the reasons, mutual physical attraction, growing up around them, and the women are just young, on this blog for why some black women only date white men. What does growing up around them have to do with preferring them like their sense of human? What makes them better than any other race? Are there any other people with opinions out there that could answer this question because I would like to learn more. What other reasons could there be? i honestly would like to know because I am ignorant on the subject.

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  28.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 25 Aug 10

    That is the law of attraction due to association. You have had positive experiences with white people so you are naturally attracted to them. That is the same why I am towards Asian people. So go with the association if it is the easiest thing to do. It is a very natural way to be attracted to an ethnic group. No harm in that. Joseph Moyer

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  29.   1Bee says:
    Posted: 24 Aug 10

    It varies from person to person! there is no "right answer" the topic is completely subjective. I am not physically attracted to black men (but occasionally one does catch my fancy)....I grew up around white people I like their sense of human, physical appearance, and general character. Bottom line, do what you want. Go with how you feel. This is not the 1800s. no one will get hurt.

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  30.   islandgrl4u says:
    Posted: 22 Aug 10

    I Choose to date outside my race... why because it is my CHOICE !! this is still America...

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  31.   Kanzan says:
    Posted: 21 Aug 10

    I think it would be interesting to see if the interracial dating/marrying characteristic of the young people in America changed as they got older. I see alot more black women dating/marrying outside their race when they are younger, but once they get to their middle 30's to early 40's they either settle down with a black man, or, choose to be single the rest of their lives. I think what happens is that when they were young, they had a few bad experiences with black men (or only had good experiences with white men), and then begin to generalize. After several years of experience sets in, their mindset changes and they realize that the grass isnt really any greener on the other side of the fence. In fact, there are undesireable weeds everywhere, you just need to be careful what you pick (make sure it isnt a weed). :)

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  32.   lotus09 says:
    Posted: 19 Aug 10

    I'm a 48 year old bi-racial woman (black mother/white father) who has dated across the board (Ethiopian, white guy from UK, married 24 years to a Latino) and I loved them all. So this is nothing new to me. My only comment is what are all these racist attitudes doing on an interracial dating site? Why can't we have an intelligent conversation without being indignant? Why must we denigrate each other with such cruel comments? These are attitudes I would have expected when my mom and pops were getting it on (1960s North Carolina). This is 2010 people WAKE UP, WE'RE ALL OF ONE RACE - THE HUMAN RACE!!

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    • serenity33 says:
      Posted: 22 Aug 10

      I think certain willful females that are fickle in their relationships and are spoiled should be sent to the middle Eastern Muslim countries to see how good they have it with American men. Give them a year there and their attitude would change drastically and they wouldn't be so quick to take American men of any race for granted when they see how bad the Muslim women in the Middle East have it!!;-) Joseph Moyer

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  33.   20something says:
    Posted: 18 Aug 10

    I just think they're hot. And most I've met think I'm hot, too. That's all there is to it.

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    • serenity33 says:
      Posted: 21 Aug 10

      I totally agree. We are all one race and we should marry whomever we want to no matter what your race is. We should take each person as an individual and not a race. Just make sure you are psychologically, spiritually, and compatible in life goals and interests. Sharing of interests and goals and having temperaments that compliment each other are the most important thing to a healthy marriage and long term relationship, not what race you are. We are all indeed one race made up of different individuals who think different ways and have different baggage and that should be what is of concern and dealt with, not what race you are.

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  34.   brian says:
    Posted: 17 Aug 10

    im a white guy who is married to a beutiful black woman. i have a black friend who i have known since we were kids, and he is the nicest guy i know but black women wont date him because they think he's just like another black man they've dated befoe. one time my wife invited over her friends whom are black and i tried to hook one of them up with my friend. the ladys started picking on my friend talking about how his family is from the ghetto and all this bullcrap which made my friends self-esteem very low to the point he didnt want to talk to any woman. my wife kicked her friends out of our house and hasnt spoken to them since neither have i spoken to my friend.i dont know where he's at and im very worried about him. trevor2010 i think you have the best comment on this whole page. you and joseph

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  35.   trevor2010 says:
    Posted: 17 Aug 10

    saying that i guess i have to date outside of race because you women are making me think alot. i just wonder if every black woman thinks black men are angry, ghetto, etc. i have never labeled a black woman anything, i dont see how any of you could. by the way i commented because i support IR relationships. i never really wanted to date outside of my race because i love black women and felt the need to give a black woman anything she desires. but if a female of another race were interested in me and i was interested in her i would give it a chance. this is my last comment because im a black man who doesnt want to be insulted by women of my own color.

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  36.   trevor2010 says:
    Posted: 17 Aug 10

    well im a 21 yr old black man, and i have never once thought about hurting a black woman or woman of any color for that matter because my mom was abused on a daily basis when i was a child.By a white and a black man. so i have no stereotypes against anybody.the white man who was just about to be my stepdad left one night with my mom and they said they would be back in a bit. an hour later my grandmother was at the door crying because he had stabbed my mom in the stomach for talking back to him. the black man she dated would just abuse her everyday.sorry for the long story but my point is im a black man and i would never hurt a woman of any race. i love black women but alot of the comments i have read from some of you women makes me somewhat afraid to enter a relationship with a black woman now. thanks, i guess

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  37.   itslife says:
    Posted: 17 Aug 10

    the reason i date white women is because all black women say black men disrepect them and all this bullcrap. when i know white guy that beat the hell out of their black girlfriends. and i do nothing about because im tired of black men being labeled. besides the one time i got into a fight with my friend for hitting her she just went back to him so whats the point of breaking up my friendship when shes going to run back to him.

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  38.   sicilian744 says:
    Posted: 15 Aug 10

    It's preference not racism!

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  39.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 12 Aug 10

    Right on brother.:-) Joseph Moyer

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  40.   chiefbob89 says:
    Posted: 12 Aug 10

    Im a white guy that feels you should be able to date or be with whom ever you want to be with. my high school sweetheart was a beautiful black girl from a very nice family that lived just up the block from me she was a year younger than I but we went to the same school hung out with the same friends etc. it was the 1970s and things were diffrent back then but we just clicked as " people " we had similar interests likes dislikes and our personalities just meshed together well and we were friends for years long before that night after rollerskating when we had our first kiss {I was 15 years old} some white guys gave me crap about it once in a while and some black guys teased her and called her oreo cookie and tried to make her feel bad for being with me { I think they were just jealous because she was very attractive} our families were a little uneasy about us at first but they accepted us because they knew it was what we both wanted. To us it wasnt about skin color it was about her and I and us together she was my first real love & we stayed together all thru high school and a little after that. My thought about the whole race thing is if you dont mind it dont matter, even as kids we were able to see past race and become friends and later a whole lot more .

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  41.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 12 Aug 10

    Cool.:-) Joseph Moyer

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  42.   Member says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    LOL.. Sure you can. Who am I to stop you? Others are benefit as well, each woman brings her magic, gifts, and light. Mine is connected to my soul energy, another woman can have other attributes or different ones that make shine like a divine star she is. But like I said who am I to stop you if its all light and laughter. Moon

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  43.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    Thanks Moon.:-) You are the best!!:-) After all, this is a dating site and almost everyone on here seems to give compliments for baser reasons rather than just really appreciating a person honestly for who they are without any hidden agendas. But you know I am just an honest goof at heart that says too much that often gets himself into trouble for doing so.;-) I can still look up to you and wish other women were like you can't I?:-) Joseph Moyer

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  44.   Member says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    LMAO... Joseph.. Your fine. I am not embarrassed. Your fine. You have a sweet spirit. I do not feel as though you are trying to "pick me up", Your cool Peace and love Moon

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  45.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    And moon, I really am sorry if I embarrassed you. Just being honest and calling it as I perceive it. Not trying to make you feel uncomfortable at all or pick you up. I don't want this blog to turn into a pickup spot because I never use blogs to try and pick anyone up. I just like the discourse, not here for the intercourse!!;-D Sincerely, Joseph

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  46.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    You admit you are a white man? Oh no!! That could be fatal on some of these blogs unless they like your picture!!;-) Take it from one who knows first hand!!;-) Just teasing you bro.:-) Although I don't think any pure Latino or Asians read this blog much. The African American sisters will let you go if you post a good picture and/or don't act too intelligent.;-)(they like to be smarter than you;-) Seriously though good luck.:-) If you are lucky, you will find someone like stupidity is a disease otherwise known as Moon. She is a fantastic person.:-) I don't want to embarrass her too much though or else she will be too embarrassed by my comments to blog any more and I want to hear what she has to say on things.:-) Even worse, they may accuse her of really being me and just making her up to have someone agree with me!!;-) I don't want her to suffer that fate!!!;-) Anyway, good luck m3. I hope you fare well.(Is that how you spell it? I am not trying to say farewell but fair well or do well? Sorry if that is a spelling error.)

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  47.   RickHayes says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    I admit it. I am a white man. I want a female love, white, Hispanic, Asian, or black. IM m3 if interested.

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  48.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    No problem. Just being honest and calling it as I see.:-) Joseph Moyer

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  49.   Snickers38 says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    Well thank you for understanding where i am coming from. Like i said its doesnt bother me who dates who but when its done for the wrong reason thats when it becomes an issue with me. I just wish that people would do things for the right reasons.

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  50.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 11 Aug 10

    Thank you. I just wish others would see I am not here for their ill.;-) And I bet our auras match a great deal. I have been told that as far as colors, there are red, white and blue(not the American flag) but I would bet yours is really dark blue like I have been told my those who are sensitive to auras have told me. Auras can only be described with synethesia, translating one sense into another like the sound of a sunset or the color of beautiful music. I really wish I could perceive your aura totally because I bet it is like a swirl of beautiful colors that are constantly moving and twirling in and out of themselves or like a beautiful concerto with rhythms and harmonies and sub-harmonies intertwining in a beautiful masterpiece.:-) But like you said, it is something that you feel and I am just using synethesia to describe as best as my feeble wording can. I never get to say that to anyone for two reasons. One, few people understand what in the world I am talking about especially when it comes to auras and two, most of the auras I read in person make me sad because they aren't very pleasant to perceive. So thank you for giving me the opportunity to express myself to someone who understands and has a wonderful aura.:-) Thanks for being you.:-) Sincerely, Joseph Moyer

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